If you have been reading for a little while, then you know I have been having some health issues. I have been in and out of doctors offices. I have had my blood drawn more in the last 2 months then I have had in my entire life and I have had every type of scan possible, except a PET scan.
Originally, just before Christmas I made a trip to the ER for pain in my side. We were expecting them to tell us in was my appendix. They quickly came back and said it was a blood clot in a vein going to my right ovary (Ovarian Vein Thrombosis). They sent for more testing and came back and said it was actually a ovarian cyst and instructed me to see an OB as soon as possible. Due to the holidays and it being so close to the end of the year, getting an appointment took a bit longer then wanted. But within a week I was in a OB's office having another ultrasound down. He left the room and took a bit longer then he should have if everything was normal. When he came back in the room he told me the original diagnosis of the blood clot was correct. The thing is, this type of blood clot doesn't just happen on its own. There is usually another medical issue that is causing it. I was told to take an aspirin a day and the clot should break up on its own. But my doctor wanted to find out what could have been causing the clot. So off for more scans and a full panel of blood work to find any kind of clotting disorder.
My scans came back fine, with no infection which was good news. A few weeks had passed since I had the blood work done and I was getting ready to call my OB to find out what the results were. That day I got a call from an Oncology and Hematology office with a referral to see them. I was confused because I hadn't had any results reported to me. I call my OB office and they explained that some of my blood work came back with a mild clotting disorder and they wanted a hematologist to take a look at my records. So off to another doctors office for more blood work.
I arrived and sat down in the room. The doctor came in and began the normal questions as he went of my file.
What brought you here?
Do you understand what is going on?
What is your medical history?
Then the less common questions began....
Have you been pregnant before?
How many miscarriages have you had?
So only 1 pregnancy and 1 live birth?
Were there complications?
Hmmmmm.... so no miscarriages? Really?
He then called his partner in to the room and we repeated the same conversation. Then they began to talk like I wasn't in the room. They are both Indian, so they were talking so fast to one another and I was having a hard time keeping up. I was able to catch bits and pieces of the conversation. They were talking about how it wasn't a severe clotting disorder, but it should have presented by now. They said I should have had a harder pregnancy and both seemed very surprised by the fact that I had had a successful pregnancy. They kept asking if I was sure that I had had no miscarriages. I told them I had taken several tests over the past few months before getting a positive test. And only had 1 positive test followed by a great pregnancy and a birth.
Then they began to talk about medications. The hematologist explained that if I were to want to get pregnant again it could be difficult and dangerous. The clot could effect my right ovary and make it stop working and the clotting disorder could put me and a new baby at risk. He wanted to start a round of blood thinners in order to "protect my fertility." The blood thinners would help break the clot up and keep another clot from forming. He said this should have presented before now. It should have been harder to get pregnant and stay pregnant for me in the first place. They were surprised to see the disorder present so late.
The things is, Matthew and I are more then likely done having kids. I would love to have a second baby and have always thought that we maybe would at some point, but I am also content with just Finley. But there is something about being told you can't, you shouldn't or if you do it could be dangerous to have another child that makes me say "but what if I wanted more?" Matthew and I are also kind of system buckers. So if you tell us we can't do something we respond with a "you don't know me!" (Not that this means we will be having a second baby any time soon!!) But your heart plays a funny trick with your brain when you hear those words and you start to run all the reason you want another baby and what it would be like. But now it is no longer your choice to not have another child. It was a choice that was made for you. There is something satisfying when you say I am done. This is a choice I am making for me and my family. We are happy and content and complete. There is something that breaks a little inside you when you are told it is no longer your choice.
Originally, just before Christmas I made a trip to the ER for pain in my side. We were expecting them to tell us in was my appendix. They quickly came back and said it was a blood clot in a vein going to my right ovary (Ovarian Vein Thrombosis). They sent for more testing and came back and said it was actually a ovarian cyst and instructed me to see an OB as soon as possible. Due to the holidays and it being so close to the end of the year, getting an appointment took a bit longer then wanted. But within a week I was in a OB's office having another ultrasound down. He left the room and took a bit longer then he should have if everything was normal. When he came back in the room he told me the original diagnosis of the blood clot was correct. The thing is, this type of blood clot doesn't just happen on its own. There is usually another medical issue that is causing it. I was told to take an aspirin a day and the clot should break up on its own. But my doctor wanted to find out what could have been causing the clot. So off for more scans and a full panel of blood work to find any kind of clotting disorder.
My scans came back fine, with no infection which was good news. A few weeks had passed since I had the blood work done and I was getting ready to call my OB to find out what the results were. That day I got a call from an Oncology and Hematology office with a referral to see them. I was confused because I hadn't had any results reported to me. I call my OB office and they explained that some of my blood work came back with a mild clotting disorder and they wanted a hematologist to take a look at my records. So off to another doctors office for more blood work.
I arrived and sat down in the room. The doctor came in and began the normal questions as he went of my file.
What brought you here?
Do you understand what is going on?
What is your medical history?
Then the less common questions began....
Have you been pregnant before?
How many miscarriages have you had?
So only 1 pregnancy and 1 live birth?
Were there complications?
Hmmmmm.... so no miscarriages? Really?
He then called his partner in to the room and we repeated the same conversation. Then they began to talk like I wasn't in the room. They are both Indian, so they were talking so fast to one another and I was having a hard time keeping up. I was able to catch bits and pieces of the conversation. They were talking about how it wasn't a severe clotting disorder, but it should have presented by now. They said I should have had a harder pregnancy and both seemed very surprised by the fact that I had had a successful pregnancy. They kept asking if I was sure that I had had no miscarriages. I told them I had taken several tests over the past few months before getting a positive test. And only had 1 positive test followed by a great pregnancy and a birth.
Then they began to talk about medications. The hematologist explained that if I were to want to get pregnant again it could be difficult and dangerous. The clot could effect my right ovary and make it stop working and the clotting disorder could put me and a new baby at risk. He wanted to start a round of blood thinners in order to "protect my fertility." The blood thinners would help break the clot up and keep another clot from forming. He said this should have presented before now. It should have been harder to get pregnant and stay pregnant for me in the first place. They were surprised to see the disorder present so late.
The things is, Matthew and I are more then likely done having kids. I would love to have a second baby and have always thought that we maybe would at some point, but I am also content with just Finley. But there is something about being told you can't, you shouldn't or if you do it could be dangerous to have another child that makes me say "but what if I wanted more?" Matthew and I are also kind of system buckers. So if you tell us we can't do something we respond with a "you don't know me!" (Not that this means we will be having a second baby any time soon!!) But your heart plays a funny trick with your brain when you hear those words and you start to run all the reason you want another baby and what it would be like. But now it is no longer your choice to not have another child. It was a choice that was made for you. There is something satisfying when you say I am done. This is a choice I am making for me and my family. We are happy and content and complete. There is something that breaks a little inside you when you are told it is no longer your choice.
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